Funny Pages
25/01/08. Taken from a two-part interview. Michael Shank interviews Noam Chomsky for, "Foreign Policy In
Focus"
Michael Shank: Is the leading Democrats’ policy vis-à-vis Iraq at all different from the Bush administration’s
policy? [Follows, is an exerpt of Chomsky's answer. Enjoy. - DVM.]
Noam Chomsky: The latest study of Iraqi opinion, carried out by the American military, provides an illustration.
There is an interesting article about it by Karen DeYoung in the Washington Post. She said the American
military is very excited and cheered to see the results of this latest study, which showed that Iraqis
have “shared beliefs.” They’re coming together. They’re getting to political reconciliation. Well,
what are the shared beliefs? The shared beliefs are that the Americans are responsible for all the
horrors that took place in Iraq, as the Nuremberg principles hold, and they should get out. That’s
the shared belief. So yes, they accept American principles. But the American government rejects them
totally as does elite opinion. And the same is true in Europe, incidentally. That’s point number one.
The second point is that there is a shared assumption here and in the West that we own the world. Unless you
accept that assumption, the entire discussion that is taking place is unintelligible. For example, you see a
headline in the newspaper, as I saw recently in the Christian Science Monitor, something like “New Study of
Foreign Fighters in Iraq.” Who are the foreign fighters in Iraq? Some guy who came in from Saudi Arabia. How
about the 160,000 American troops? Well, they’re not foreign fighters in Iraq because we own the world;
therefore we can’t be foreign fighters anywhere. Like, if the United States invades Canada, we won’t be
foreign. And if anybody resists it, they’re enemy combatants, we send them to Guantanamo

War Pigs. Remake by the band Cake.
Original was written and produced by the band
Black Sabbath (1970).
Lyrics more or less attributed to band member
Geezer Butler, at Black Sabbath Online.
Luke's Wall/War Pigs
Generals gathered in their masses
Just like witches at black masses
Evil minds that plot destruction
Sorcerers of death's construction
In the fields the bodies burning
As the war machine keeps turning
Death and hatred to mankind
poisoning their brainwashed minds
Oh Lord yeah
Politicians hide themselves away
They only started the war
Why should they go out to fight
They leave that all to the poor
Time will tell on their power minds
Making war just for fun
Treating people just like pawns in chess
Wait 'till their judgment day comes
Now in darkness world stops turning
As the war machine keeps burning
No more war pigs have the power
Hand of God has struck the hour
Day of judgment God is calling
On their knees, the war pigs crawling
Begging mercy for their sins
Satan laughing spreads his wings
Oh Lord yeah

He's got a point: Comedian and television host Jay Leno: "The House Transportation Committee is now considering a bill that would allow pilots to carry guns for protection. I've got a better idea. Why not give guns to altar boys -- give them a fighting chance."
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"The Vice President is standing by his decision to
shoot Harry Whittington. Now, according to the best
intelligence available, there were quail hidden in the
brush. Everyone believed at the time there were
quail in the brush. And while the quail turned out to
be a 78 -- year --old man, even knowing that today,
Mr. Cheney insists he still would have shot Mr.
Whittington in the face. He believes the world is a
better place for his spreading buckshot throughout
the entire region of Mr. Wittington's face." -- "Daily
Show" correspondent Rob Corddry